I can’t imagine having a successful relationship with a sexual person

I’m coming to terms with my asexuality. And I’ve been reading a lot about it, watching videos etc.

One thing I see coming up a lot is “well I compromise with my partner” or “I don’t mind having sex if I need to” etc. And, like, good for you, no issues.

But I’m not like that at all.

Making out too much bothers me. Sex bothers me. I don’t know if I can compromise and do it.

It’s not even the act itself, cause I do think I could have sex maybe once a month or whatever and that would be fine. The main problem for me is that I would ALWAYS be feeling pressured. I would always be looking at my partner and thinking “ok are you trying to get with me” “do you wish I was initiating something right now”? Or I would think that, eventually, they wouldn’t be able to deal with it and just walk away. Because, well, that has happened to many people. This forum is filled with stories like that.

People’s need for sex feel like an attack to me. It feels predatory and wrong. Which isn’t fair to them, since it’s just who they are. And there’s nothing wrong with them.

I would much prefer dating someone who is also asexual. Someone who I know isn’t a ticking time bomb. But then that reduces my dating pool to pretty much no one.

It’s just such a hard choice to me and I don’t know what to do.