Think i wrecked my brain’s ability to fall asleep with drugs

So im an 18 year old who has had insomnia periodically all troughouth his life, a few years ago back when i was 14/15 things escalated and i woke up one day feeling that i slept very lightly or haven’t slept at all, that was also the day my depersonalisation/derealisation started, wich i have been suffering chronically from for the past 3 years. At that time i was an hypochondriac and i thought i had fatal insomnia because off the crippling mental and physical pain i was in due to a lack of sleep, i did a sleep study and it all came out fine except that my sleep pattern was a little disrupted and that i woke up a lot during the night, then they wanted to give me medication and further psychological treatment but then covid hit and never heard from them again, wich at that time didn’t bother me because the sleep study proved that I didn’t have Fatal insomnia so my mind became at ease and i naturally started to sleep better because the anxiety went away, the depersonalisation/derealisation never left though and because of it i fell into a very severe addiction to both alcohol and weed, using these 2 together provides me a temporary sense of euphoria and makes my mind shut the fuck up so i also fall asleep in no time when using

But recently since the new year I’ve been trying to make a change and want to quit, but its extremely difficult, the withdrawals and cravings are bad enough on their own but the worst part of it all is that my insomnia, wich i have been drugging away for the past year has come back full force but 10X worse

The last 4 days i slept barely, 1st day after quiting i slept a few hours but only extremely light, 2nd night I didn’t sleep at all, 3rd night I didn’t drink but i smoked weed again and it allowed me to have like 4 hours of decent sleep i geuss, and last night i only slept for bloody 2 hours, and keep in mind it doesn’t even feel like that ive slept, the only sign that shows me that i have slept is the clock that skips a few hours

Im really desperate for some fucking sleep and i know its bad but tonight im drinking again for some fucking relief and i hope that i will get 6-8 hours off sleep or more tonight because of booze