Did Nanny handle this situation appropriately?
My son 1 year old throws tantrums like most kids do. I witnessed nanny handling one of his tantrums and I wanted to know if she handled it appropriately. First she asked what was wrong and for him to use his words (he’s pretty good at talking for his age) then she goes to comfort him by asking if he needs a hug if and tries to talk him down. If neither works and he’s still having a tantrum she’ll walk away and say when you’re ready to use your words I’ll be over here. Eventually he gets up and asks her for juice. But is walking way when a kid is crying appropriate to do? She does keep an eye on him while he’s throwing his tantrum (making sure he does hurt himself) Personally when my son is having a tantrum I don’t just walk away but maybe this is the way to best handle it when he’s really worked up?
Update: Hope I explained this well.
Thanks to everyone for your advice ! As many have noted this is a completely normal way to handle a tantrum. I would as well like to note my son isn’t a newly turned 1 year old, he’ll be two in February. Also want to point out my nanny DOES comfort my son, I saw some people infer she doesn’t. When he throws a tantrum she tries multiple times to calm him like ask him if he wants a hug, tell him to take deep breaths and really tries to get him to calm down and after awhile if he doesn’t calm down she walks away while still watching him to make sure he doesn’t hurt himself. Today I asked her not to walk off afterwards to see how he reacts. What I didn’t notice is with nanny if she there trying to constantly soothe him he’ll start hitting her and kicking her (which she said through trial and error this is what he does when she’s constantly trying to talk him through it, he gets more and more frustrated). She said she mentioned this to my husband but I’ve never known he did this(although she said after noticing he did this after awhile she stopped trying this way to prevent a total meltdown) My son has never really like people being all in his space (hints why nanny always asks if he wants a hug instead of just giving him one) Anyways he had a complete meltdown today we’re me and my husband couldn’t calm him nanny suggested leaving him be for a little bit and wow did he calm down pretty fast. I guess he gets more overwhelmed when you’re all up in his space lol. All kids are different and mine seems to benefit from being given his needed space. Thank you all again. No more advice needed.
Edit 2 : Many keep commenting with her saying “use your words” I was just paraphrasing what she was saying. She says things like hey when your ready to talk I’m here or hey I understand you’re feeling a bunch of emotions right now and I do to sometimes and this is how I handle it and if you want to talk I’m right over here etc… She doesn’t point blank say use your words sheesh that’s all everyone is pointing out but aren’t grasping I said she’s talking him through it not just saying a few words then walking off. I also stated I’m not looking for anymore advice but here comes the bulk of people complaining about use your words and black out everything else I said. I love the supportive comments that keep coming in, but don’t shame my Nanny.
Posted Jan 4, 2023, 6:12 PM UTC · edited