What brings you closer to Islam

I am in the worst place in my life. Religiously, mentally, emotionally, physically. I have had quite a terrible holiday where I have nothing but dislike and resentment towards my family, my religion and life in itself honestly.

I haven’t properly prayed for the first time in years nor do I have the desire to anymore. My guilt about missing it and doing sins has diminished quite significantly and I know this is the wrong approach. I’ve had my struggles with Islam but they’ve never been this bad before.

Despite everything I would like to find my way back. If you have been in a similar position, what made you re-love it? I don’t want to lose it but I blame it mostly for all of my issues and I know that’s wrong.

I’m going to start therapy soon inshaAllah so maybe I can find some relief for my other problems maybe some coping mechanisms.