What Boundaries Are Normal For Guy Friends? M22 F21
Dating for a year
I trust her guy best friend
She asks him to concerts, amusement parks, conventions. Never asks me to go. She pays for his ticket some times, and food. He doesn’t pay her back a lot of the time. We are long distance, about an hour and a half drive but I could still go but the thought is what counts. We did travel in the summer a lot too, and she doesn’t see him that often. She told me, “sorry honey I may not have much for our anniversary, I spent a lot on his ticket, etc.”
Guy at school, sus
She asks him and another guy (I trust) to go get groceries. I asked why you didn’t ask me, she said she didn’t think of it. She said I can go if I wanted but I told her that is not a genuine invite.
She planned on showing that guy her town, I would be there too, but still.
She gets out of class early, doesn’t tell me, goes and hangs out with some guys. Keep in mind it was the last day I visited her at school and I asked her when she got out before she went to class (expressed interest when she was free next).
I know she wouldn’t cheat, but it feels like emotional cheating. They get a part of her I don’t get as much of even though I do get the physical part. She doesn’t seem to invest what she can with me but invests her time with these guys. I just want the same they get too, I get she needs to balance her social life, but she doesn’t want to go on dates with me besides getting food, watching tv, sex, and that is fun, but it feels more like a convenience than an honor if that makes any sense. As if I am not a priority more like an accessory to use when she has nothing else better going on or is horny.
She doesn’t get along with girls too well, although she has a good friend group of girls. Also her major is 95% dudes so it makes sense why she is with so many dudes.
TL;DR any advice on what is normal or not and what you would do.
PLEASE DM ME INSTEAD I CANNOT SEE COMMENTS IDK WHY
Posted Feb 12, 2023, 4:03 AM UTC · edited
Just about everything you mentioned would be a major red flag. She crosses so many boundries. The big question is why are you still with her? She clearly has zero respect for you. Does she even consider you a BF or just a pet? You can do much better. At least have some self repect for yourself.
Big favor, I can’t see the other comments, can you copy and paste the other ones and dm them to me plz! Thanks man you’re right
I can not see the other comments either. I tried several options but none showed. Not sure why???
No worries brother, take care! I appreciate the advice and fyi, I ended things 3 weeks ago, just wanted clarity I made the right choice :)
You did the right thing Best in the future