Lonely Valentines

I don't know if the title fits but hey, it's the best I can do.

I've had solo valentines since my ex and I broke up years ago, and I try to better myself as much as possible, but I don't know why this one hits harder than the others. I thought, "maybe I will overcome my feelings this year, like the other years" but it was not the outcome I wanted. Don't get me wrong, I am genuinely happy for the couples celebrating this valentine's day. I just, for some damn reason, felt truly a loss of hope for love in my life.

Yes, I didn't even ask a girl out for reasons I will shorten to "I'm not ready" and many more reasons to not have a partner but I don't understand why I feel so lost when I was just fine in the past years. Despite my own rationalization of my love life, which worked in past, now it has failed me, and despite everything I feel, I know in my heart that I'm not yet ready for love or to love someone. No, I'm not hung up with my ex, I am happy my ex found someone else to love that is closer and finds support.

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Sorry, if this post made you feel attacked or angry towards me or to whom you associate with me, comment insults to me if you want. I'm just posting to feel less pressure in my heart. I'm sorry if I won't reply if ever you comment.