We've been talking for 7 months, but...

I (M26) and her (F25) work together at a catering company, I'm the executive chef and she's one of my cooks, so I am, by every definition, her boss. I'm white, and she's Mexican. I work 60-80 hours a week, and I'm a YT streamer. She was, for the past 6 years, a stay at home mom of 2. This is her first job since she had kids. Her and the father of her kids broke up 2 months before she started here, and she got the job here because her mom works for me as well.

Some background on us: I have only ever slept with one person and I've never been in a serious relationship. I've never had a serious relationship before, because I've always either been to shy around women, or, more recently, I'm happy as hell alone, so I have no reason to settle, so I'm pretty particular about who I spend my time with, let alone date, so I'm also pretty introverted and keep to myself outside of work. She has only ever had 1 serious relationship, and 1 sexual partner, that being the father of her kids. They were together for 8 years, and he physically abused her for most of that time. She was also sexually abused as a child by her step dad, and her mom put her in foster care to protect him, and cover up the abuse. Even after all that she cares so much about her ex that she won't answer my phone calls if he is in the room. Her step dad is no longer in the picture, but she still cares so deeply about her family, including her mom, they have a beautiful relationship.

As for us: It's been sparks since we first met. We light up every room, and we're the envy of all our colleagues, and friends. Everyone knows about us, because we could never hide it. We have a tremendous amount in common, we make each other laugh until it hurts, and we're always running off to have time to hold and kiss each other when we can. We've been on tons of dates, we know almost everything about each other, and we haven't slept together, but we've both said I love you. But...

The only time we go on dates is after work, I've given us days off together, and we make plans, but she always has something come up, or, one time, she completely ghosted me for the whole weekend, which I gave her shit for, because I would never do that to her. She was always concerned that I've never had a serious relationship before, and at about 4 months in to us getting to know each other, her ex found out about me, and has been trying to win her back. So, she told me she didn't know who she wanted to be with, and that she was going to decide and let both of us know. When she's at work, she wants to spend every moment with me, but when she's at home, I can never get her attention. She never picks up the phone, or calls me back, and sometimes won't text me at all.

I've given my all to her: I kiss her, I surprise her, I call her just to say I'm thinking about her, I buy her flowers, I've been learning Spanish for her, and I've tried my best to impress her mom, and son. I have done so many things for her, and none of it has been to try and "win" her, I'm just so in love with her that I think about her every time I see flowers, I can't help but want to learn Spanish, and I spend all day thinking about when I'll get to kiss her again. When she told me that she wasn't sure who she wanted to be with, I respected it and told her that I would wait, but not forever. I told her I could wait 2 months, but after that I would assume that she isn't serious about being with me.

2 and half weeks ago, that day came. I gave us both off so we could talk, but she never called, and never texted me. I called her multiple times, but she never answered or called me back. So at the end of the day, I curated a very detailed text, that was so loving that it made my friend, who proofread the text for me, cry, but it basically said that I was madly in love with her, but I'm suffering waiting for her decision, so I have to move on, with or without her.

The next day, at 7am, she responded, she waited all night because she read the text and was in such shock of losing me that she blasted music and deep cleaned her house to forget about it. We texted back and forth that morning confessing how deeply we cared about each other until we saw each other at work. I pulled her into the office and held her face in my hands, she had broken out with acne from all the stress of this decision. We held each other, and she told me everything that she had been holding back from me (this was about the sexual abuse from her childhood), but also that the idea of losing me makes her sick to her stomach, and that her heart is screaming at her to be with me, but the only reason she even considers being with her ex instead is because he can't really hurt her heart anymore where as I'm a much scarier choice because she has such strong feelings for me. Then she asked me for 1 more week, and guaranteed me that she would make a decision by that time.

Well, that was almost 2 weeks ago, and she hasn't even brought it up. Like it never happened, or it doesn't matter. It's torture being so in love with someone, but they just can't say it: "I want to be with you," or "I want to be your girlfriend," and I don't know what to do anymore. All of my friends and family have said either to run because she doesn't make me a priority, or to not lose hope because she's clearly in love with me too. I understand that she has kids, and is extremely family oriented, so when I'm alone at home hoping for a phone call, she is surrounded by family, and they would probably be upset if she spent that time on the phone with me, but how am I supposed to accept that? How am I supposed to wait around, date, or possibly marry someone that will always put me second to their family?

I don't know what to do, or think anymore, because I'm just tired of not knowing where she stands. Do I keep waiting and hoping, or do I move on?