[362] An Afterbirth of Greed

Hey there. Obviously, it's been a couple years since I visited here, so I hope the rules haven't changed too much. I just worked on this one day and abandoned it, like I usually do, so I was wondering if I can write at all. However, if the Mods feel that my prior critique does not work, please let me know and I will happily resubmit. Thanks for your time. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ihzv5p2X309gVyxsugipLhHSk_PB0eY9LX3NheNY50o/edit

Critique: https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/11fzolw/530_cellar/jao7m1f/