Am I over reacting?

Update

Thanks to all who commented. We were able to discuss this issue and understand each others perspectives and I apologised for my over reaction. We saw each other Wednesday through to Thursday and had a great time. I’m seeing him again next week before his leave ends. There is a strong connection between us, but the situation is tricky (military, LDR, both having kids and limited availability). I was anticipating our first date would be a night of fun and nothing more than that. This has been unexpected for us both.

For those querying his ‘story’, it is totally genuine. He shared pictures throughout his deployment, we video called when we could and his white skin is currently (tanned) darker than my brown skin. He has also been open with me about his personal circumstances, as I have to him.

Looking for others thoughts on this situation. A couple months ago I (F42) went on a first date with a man who’s in the military and was due to be deployed the following day. The date was great, we really hit it off and he spent the night at mine and we had great chemistry.

During his deployment we texted as much as we could and spoke every few days unless he was on exercise and then not contactable. We’ve both talked about how much we like each other, looking forward to seeing each other again etc. initially he struggled with the idea that I could carry on dating others as I wasn’t going to promise exclusivity after 1 date but we accepted each others boundaries (I didn’t end up dating anyone else which was my choice and he didn’t know that until recently)

I noticed him being a bit less responsive/less texting during last week or so of his deployment and said I’d noticed a difference and if everything was ok. He said he was desperate to come home and struggling a bit. We haven’t spoken on the phone since this time either.

The plan was always that we’d get together this weekend. This morning he texted to say he was coming back tomorrow (he’s been back in the country for the last week, but his base is a couple hours away). I asked why he wasn’t back today/this evening as assumed we’d be spending it together and he said he’d offered to help his friend move house. He said he could see me tomorrow afternoon and due to my kids coming back home from their dad’s tomorrow, meant we’d have up to 2 hours together. I said how this would be tricky and we wouldn’t have much time and asked if it was an option that he come back later this evening straight to mine and no response.

I spent a good few hours thinking this over and felt like his actions weren’t really communicating that he was keen to see me and that if he had really wanted to see me, he would, especially after 2 months of saying we wanted to see each other. I messaged him saying that and ultimately that I didn’t think this was working for me. I’ve been looking forward to seeing him for so long and this anticipation has been built up and now I just feel ‘dropped’ and disappointed. Am I over reacting? How would you make sense of this situation?