Do they grieve the separation?

Even though they choose to make the decisions (like leaving) are they aware at all of the damage they’re causing? Spouse left (her choice) which I thought would’ve made her happier if she’s in a manic state. However, she still seems so angry. Saw her for the first time in weeks and she looks so rough. Hair was gross looking, no makeup, (which is out of her character) obviously still refused to speak to me. I can just see it on her face she is mad. Why is she so mad? If she left like she wanted shouldn’t she be happier? She wanted to separate. Do they grieve the separation too, in their own way? I appreciate this forum, as this is all semi-new to me and I’m trying to navigate this in the healthiest way. I was a great spouse, good career, treated her like gold. I’m really just struggling a lot right now with self worth on why I wasn’t good enough, when in the beginning she made me feel like a million bucks. Is she grieving the loss now, or will that be later on? Anyone on here have them come back or try to? How did that go? I’m fighting back and forth with myself over all the unanswered questions I have to deal with.