Long distance and DB.... Help

I have been dating my guy for 5 months or so. I'm 32 f and he's 31 m. We live on opposite sides of the country. We met while we were both on vacation this summer. We hit it off immediately. He was very handsy and touchy geeky the first 6-8 weeks. We had sex out first time a few weeks into the relationship. We've had sex maybe 5 times in total. We've had a DB since end of September. We see each other 2 times a month, alternating flights to see each other. He's affectionate in the sense that he loves to hug, cuddle and light kisses but nothing more intimate than that. I confronted him about it twice. First time, he said he doesn't want me to be a fuck buddy, and he respects me. Last month when we spoke he said that he likes sex but its not a necessity and he can live without it. I'm not exactly a HL, but only seeing each other a few days a month, you'd think he'd want to have sex once a trip... Meaning 2x a month. I asked point blank if he doesn't think in attractive, or if he thinks my bedroom skills are insufficient and he said "no".

I'm getting frustrated. I really like him and I want to make this work. I've had only a handful of partners. He's had 30+ and he's had a much less vanilla background than I.

I've made some subtle advances toward him, thinking he wants me to initiate. No luck there.

I fly this weekend to Cali to see him and I want some ideas.

TL;DR: long distance relationship isn't having much bedroom lovin' despite conversations and mild initiation.