Source
r/WLW•
Visible-Use-2496

Am I being unreasonable?

So I recently started seeing someone in May and we’ve been hanging out and stuff since. Since we met, I’ve been seeing her maybe once or twice every two weeks and we barely go out really, we’re indoors most of the time (its winter rn). I’ve been understanding and considerate of that for the most part, especially when it comes to finances and going out on dates…My biggest issue is that she wont let me see her more often during the week because shes got work and im just failing to understand why work is that much of an excuse especially because she’s working from home (remote)? i mean really all i want is to be around her and be in her presence and its starting to feel like im doing too much for asking the bare minimum such as quality time. Why cant we be busy together? exhausted together or stressed together? im super hesitant to even mention that i want to come over or i want to spend time with her ever because i dont want her to feel overwhelmed or as though im not understanding shes got work or her own life going on of which i do too… Its just a bit unfair to me cause now my love languages are not being met and i cant be with someone who i consider a partner who wont love me the way i need to be loved either. I want to have fun dating someone, I want the spontaneity and the constant excitement and its like with us barely even seeing eachother, the connection is starting to cut on my end and its fustrating… I tried to communicate my issues with her and she had me explaining why i want to see her more often and its just like…why do i even have to explain? we didnt even get to a solution thats gonna work for the both of us… Idk im just thinking of maybe even calling it quits at the moment cause i definitely dont deserve to not be prioritised and not be a part of my partners routine. I dont deserve to be pushed away to the side when shes got shit going on…its just hurtful to me cause i definitely would not do her like that (mind you, she stays less than 20minutes away from me so i dont get whats the actual fuss on her end)…

Posted Jul 14, 2023, 1:43 PM UTC

15
yellow_algaeBi•

Yes you are. She's trying to work??? If she was in the office you also wouldn't see her but because she's at home it's different. That makes no sense. She needs to concentrate and focus

I personally could not work around a partner. Why should she be pushed out of her comfort zone because you need constant attention.

1
Visible-Use-2496OP•

hectic

1
luvanonymous•

I disagree. She doesn’t work all day, there’s some time within the day they can see each other at least more than twice every two weeks. No one, absolutely no one is that busy for someone they genuinely want to see and be with because you would prioritize and find time for the person u really like even if ur one of the busiest person in the world.

1
LaLunaDomina•

It could be as simple as you both having different needs and expectations for a new relationship. Worst case scenario she has some other life she isn't telling you about, best case scenario she just prioritizes her time and values her job over a new relationship, but either way, you two might just be incompatible. It isn't unreasonable for you to want to bask in NRE, but it's also not unreasonable for her to need her space.

1
luvanonymous•

You know the saying “if they wanted to they would”…well that applies. If u truly are interested in someone and really like them then u would find and make time for them within ur schedule because u would prioritize them and fit them into ur life. It seems like u need to communicate and ask what she wants out of this relationship with you because no one who’s into wanting to build a serious commitment would just want to see you twice every two weeks. When two people are falling for each other and have feelings then they start wanting to see each other more and more so they could eventually build a life together.

1