If you haven't dated women who grew up with social media as an average man, you don't understand the situation average young men are in

Dating women who grew up with social media vs dating women who grew up without social media is a night and day difference. It's completely incomparable. It's apples vs tomahawk missiles.

Therefore, any type of "well I / those guys found a girlfriend, therefore so can you" argument simply doesn't count if the girlfriend(s) in question grew up without a significant amount of social media use.

And indeed: 63% of young men are single. If most people fail in a group, then it's not really the individual's fault, it's a systemic issue. If we discussed any group other than men and 63% of people in that group struggled, then everyone would immediately agree that some systemic issue was at play and that saying "just improve" was heartless.

The gini coefficient - a measure of inequality - shows men have more dating inequality than Zimbabwe wealth inequality.

Now of course, there's always individual exceptions to general trends. And indeed, social media and internet dating have actually made it easier for hot guys to get laid. But for average young men in 2023, dating is hell.

78% of women compete for the top 20% of men. This directly implies that only a bottom-22% woman is aiming for a 7.5 / 10 man (i.e. not a top-20% man). So a 7.5 / 10 man can only easily find a 2.2 / 10 girlfriend. Now sure, if this man "shops around on the dating market" then he can probably find a 3 / 10 or even 4 / 10 woman who will "settle" for him, but the situation is still unfair.

So yes, it's theoretically possible for a lot of guys to get laid / get in relationships if they improve themselves and lower their standards. But guys are pissed that if they improve until they're a 7.5 / 10, they can only easily get a 2.2 / 10 woman, and maybe a 4/10 woman if they date a lot. Men think that's unfair, and they're right.

And women's pickiness isn't good for women either. Because if 78% of women compete for the top 20% of men, then most women are going to end up single and childless. And I know that current 20-something and 30-something women often think that being single and childless is fine, and it's true that being a single childless 20-something or 30-something woman is a pretty good life. However there are very few single childless 50-something women out there who are happy. I think that two decades from now, we'll have an endless sea of miserable single childless 50-something women who are that way because they rejected the 7/10 guys, but they couldn't get the 8/10 guys to commit to them.

Women also don't seem to understand that men rate women on two criteria: "how good is she for one-night stands" and "how good is she for marrying."

Most young women score high on "how good is she for banging", because she's young and hot, and thus average young women likely have casual sex with a bunch of 8/10 and 9/10 guys. And then that young woman tries to later settle down with an 8/10 or 9/10 guys. But those guys will only bang her, not commit to her. Her "good for banging" score may have been very high, but that doesn't mean that her "how good is she for marriage" score is high. Thus the once-beautiful-young-woman fails to ultimately get commitment from the 8/10 guy and eventually may become a bitter cat lady.

I'm not saying this because I want it to happen, I'm saying this because I think average-ish women would on average have better lives if they settled for a 7/10 guy and didn't insist on chasing the top-20% guys like almost every woman does.