How can I [19F] talk about child abuse to my therapist without getting my parents reported?
My dad is abusive and he recently hit me while I was having an argument with my mom. It wasn't life-threatening but my eardrum ached for a week and I had various small injuries over my body. He has a shitty personality but he doesn't generally hit me (this was the first time in a few years), he just threatens, curses or insults me, or sometimes shoves me.
My mom is very controlling and expects me to be passive with my dad's abuse. She wants me to keep quiet and take it all like she has been for all these years. Yeah, my dad beat the crap out of her in front of me when I was young. He doesn't hit her anymore but he is still cursing and mistreating her as well as me.
Mom stays silent and expects me to stay silent because of *finances*. She thinks we'll be poor if we let go of my dad even though she makes a lot and has a higher paying salary. For years, that wasn't actually the case and she was greedy, but recently, we acquired a huge mortgage and can't afford to live without my dad paying the credit card bills. If there's another ACS case, we might all end up on the streets.
There are other issues I have with my mom, such as her need to control all decisions in my life and her inability to listen to what I have to say. I love my mom (not always) but I definetely resent her for all the damage she's done to me.
I want to talk to a therapist about my parents but I'm scared that CPS will be involved if my therapist finds out what my dad is like. That's because even though I am an adult, I have a younger sibling[13M] who is daddy's favorite and is not abused. I know enough about mandated reporting to understand that witnessing abuse is also classified as child abuse.
However, I need to talk about this situation to someone. It's affecting my college grades, my self-confidence my mom constantly destroys, my mental health, and my sleep. I feel miserable and choked. I wish someone would listen to me without consequences.
I know what y'all are going to say- that I should tell my therapist about this and just let ACS handle the case. Well, I dont want to. Last time I did this, my mom went to jail and my dad just left the country. I don't like the idea of either of my parents going to jail (mainly cuz my mom would hate it) or my brother ending up in America's shitty foster care system. I still have 2 years of college left and my parents pay my tuition.
So then my possible options - 1) I don't mention my brother when I talk about my family, 2) I mention my brother but not his age, 3) I tell them about the ACS closing my case and declaring there's no threat 4) I don't go to therapy and just bear it silently. Do you have any other ideas?
Posted Oct 9, 2023, 11:05 AM UTC