I don't have rabies, but for stupid reason, I think I do.
I do not have rabies, but have a strong feeling I do. Such a strong feeling, I'm almost manipulated by myself that I will die tomorrow because of it. One half tells me I'm just self diagnosing and it's all coincidental, but the other half is just a nightmare. Where did this sudden realization come from? Am I being paranoid? Is this a symptom of rabies? I just feel too split and it's digging into my family life. My parents keep telling me I don't, the "bite marks" on me that I found on my nose could be pimples from me playing with my Oculus Quest 2. This is the main reason I am so, so, so, so, paranoid. It's an ongoing tunnel, I die tomorrow, or I don't and I'm just making things up. This sounds like a joke but to me, an existential crisis. Is this just my brain telling me that I'm tired, but then, if you search up "symptoms of rabies", you'd find that lethargy or lethargic episodes are a symptom. This might just be a series of coincidences that I am taking wrongly, or I die tomorrow. Am I slowly dying? Or am I not? I really hope not. I just came back, brushed my teeth, freshened up and I might reconsider. I feel these just happen to be things, coincidences, that are just there that made me put the puzzle pieces together wrong. Why am I being so paranoid? It will stop, and I will make it tomorrow. I try everything to get it off my mind, but like a parasite, it's there... Eerily.. Why doesn't this thought just go.? My brother cannot grasp how I can connect all these things to rabies. But then again, he is still under 13, so of course he wouldn't understand, nor care about rabies that much. Even though he might sound like he has no room to talk, he might be right. Why would I connect this to rabies? So many questions.. Yet, I can't give myself any answers. Questions Are never solved by the person who asked, because that's the reason they did. But, sometimes they tend to make wrong inferences when they don't get an answer. How do I stop this self diagnosis? It might sound silly, but I am just at an ends wit.
Posted Oct 23, 2023, 9:25 PM UTC