Proud of myself

No contact hasn't been the easiest and I have broken it a few times now.

I asked him to block me on Instagram because my friend suggestions were becoming all the new women he followed on IG (yay)

He obliged and told me he would drop off my stuff this week. I have three things there that I could easily replace.

So I asked him if this was him wanting to use dropping off my stuff as an opportunity to talk, or just return my stuff.

He said what is there to talk about, asked me twice. Instead of me bearing my heart and saying I wanted him back, I told him if he has nothing more to say to me then I do not need my belongings.

I've already embarrassed myself enough since he left. It was his decision. I am not harming my mental health to simply get a glimpse of him again just to hand me my things. I don't want clothes that smell like his house.

Normally I would have just agreed and hoped and prayed he wanted to talk. I would have created a bunch of false hope in my head and been anxious until he reached out again to bring me my things.

This time, I chose myself. Back to NC and now blocked on IG. I feel slightly relieved.