does it get better?

I am engaged to my fiancé, and we have 2 beautiful kids ages 2 and 1. I am a stay at home mom and also attempting to get a certificate so I can get into a career, and he started his own business.

He doesn’t assume many responsibilities of our kids or in our household bedsides the financial responsibility- which I honor and appreciate the heck out of him for. Like trust me I don’t know what it’s like to be the sole financial provider feeding and providing for not just 4 humans but our 2 dogs as well. He does a damn good job of it. I don’t ask much of him ever around the house - down to picking up the dog shit and mowing the yard, I take that on.

The conversation has been had so many times that I need some more help especially trying to take on school - it’s at my own pace but that seems to be making it more challenging. I stated a task he could take on that would take a lot off my plate and it got done for maybe 2 weeks and it’s ended and I’m back to doing said task. Not to mention me attempting to learn a new career to be in has been something the both of us has wanted for our family.

Being his own boss allows him a lot more freedom than my 2 little bosses ever allow me, they have me starting my work day at 5am sharp including the weekends. He typically doesn’t start his day till 8:30/9am at the earliest. I cook all meals, keep a clean house everyday, I give our kids a bath and do houseclean up from the day, and then put our kids to bed and he will most likely then jump in and help read a couple books.

Anytime I do bring up these issues I’m gaslighted. And that’s a whole other issue. 😭

Does anyone see where I’m coming from with this? Is this just me? He can’t seem to ever figure out why I’m so angry and so bitter all the time. Why I’m so exhausted and tapped by the end of my day.