I have the perfect husband, I don’t deserve him

I know usually come here to share their problems but i need to share this with someone it might sound silly and paranoid but please don’t judge me it’s long and all over the place because that’s how i feel now…. I have the perfect husband , he is good looking hard working and funny … he helps me with everything around the house even though we both have a job, I have a 9 to 5 and he starts and finishes much earlier which means I always gat back to a clean house and now that i’m pregnant after 2 years of marriage he’s doing even more, some of you might think he’s too nice because he’s cheating but his phone is never off limits while he never touches mine . I don’t know what i did to deserve that I’m in no way a perfect wife , I’ve had some serious infertility problems and he stood by my side through all of that i felt unworthy going through it knowing how much he loves children… I have a lot of dark secrets and horrible past with an abusive father struggles with depression self hard rape you name it and i hide all that from him … he doesn’t ask and doesn’t wanna know about my past toxic relationships and I don’t talk about it since i know it’s gonna be really hard for him to accept since his life is so normal and he’s so sensitive sometimes i feel like an imposter around him and his family my MIL is a bit annoying sometimes but nothing beyond that we had some serious problems when we got married since we didn’t know each other well and our relationship and engagement was really fast because it was for the wrong reasons on my side i told him i hate him alot for the first year … i used to help more around the house i cook whenever i can but this pregnancy is making me too weak and i pray he doesn’t get bored of me ….