I (24f) am unsure if I love my husband (30m)

Jumping right into it, I moved across the country to be with him. Started as an online relationship he was my best friend and confidant for the past few years. I moved in August of 2020 to be with him after very little planning on both of our parts. His family is extremely Christian and can't just let others believe in what they want. So since the moment I stepped through the door it was "when are you getting married?" I started isolating myself in the basement because at least no one would bother me down there. Yet still, every time I'd go to the bathroom, or shower, dishing up food, even smoking my cigarettes "when are you getting married." So October of 2020 we had a courthouse wedding. I signed my life away to a man I've only been with for 2 months. Thank you peer pressure and shitty childhood. He doesn't treat me bad. He doesn't hit me at all. However when I look at him I get annoyed, angry and overall hurt.. the happiest day of my life was ripped from me because he couldn't stand up to his parents about the pressure. I can't help but to feel robbed. Ever since I was a little lass I have obsessed over my wedding. That now gets to sit on the back burner. We don't have kids, we haven't had relations in over a year because I just can't. Even now as he lay asleep next to me I want to scream and cry because I'm not worth the effort. I stood up to my parents when he lost his job. It took him more than a month to find a new job and my parents weren't having that. But I stood up. I had a voice for myself and my husband. I got my parents to quit pressuring him. He's asked me if I want a divorce several times now and every time I freeze. He's asked to do couples counseling which I'm terrified of for a number of reasons. He's a good man and I hate myself for feeling the way I do.