Had my first sissygasm from a guy

I recently had a sissygasm from getting fucked. It has always been with my dildos never from a guy. I had been having the biggest crush on this guy ever since college, and we grew close enough for me to tell him about my fetishes and fantasies. Where he accepted me for it.

We went out for a party where I had dressed up and dolled up. We had lots of drinks and we were tipsy. I went for a kiss which he then responded positively to. It then led to us going to his place.

We really went into it, and I came so much as he rammed my ass. Is this because I have feelings for him? Is it because he is bigger than most guys? I never came from a guy fucking me before. I actually have mixed feelings about this. Is this love?