Self love is bullshit.

I think the idea that people will gravitate toward you if you love yourself more is bullshit. I actually used to feel good about myself for being told that I am a kind and polite person. Yet having this confidence in myself seem to have the opposite effect, people would look to tear me down and put me in my place. These instances have just been soul crushing experiences.

A few days ago my mom told me again, that there's hope and that I was such a kind and soft spoken person. She doesn't understand my loneliness. But those few times in my life when I complimented like that I remember vividly and it means so much to me. She has no idea how much I cherish those words.

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