I will never have the chance to live

You can tell me all you want to try my best and to do things slowly and things will work out. No. I’ve had ZERO support. Ive been ABANDONED. Frankly I never learned and I do not know what to do on my own and never will. I have went to paid dr’s who talk through me like a wall. I have paid strangers to listen to me. I have tried the pills that ultimately harm me and brainwash me. I have tried all the cheap things the society has recommended but I have yet to find love. What if it’s the world ? The wars. The people starving. The fact that life is a game that you can lose , the fact that nothing is fair. The fact that people babies are addicted to drugs on the streets and no one gives a fuck. The money I earn is my fucking worth and you know it. This world is a terrible fucking place , shove all the pills you want down my throat I can’t ignore it. And no one wants me. My goal is to find a way out of here. Disgustingly evil . And I am disgustingly broken.