Kids… do you want them?

I’ve always been very anti-child for a few reasons. Genetics, for one, mental illness (including bpd) runs in my family and I would hate to pass that on, but the main reason is the fear of PPD or PPP. On top of the BPD I’m pretty sure I’m bipolar, which makes me very at risk for either condition. Recently, though, I’ve been thinking that maybe I do want kids. This is years off into the future, but I’ve been trying to rationalize this. I think that if I continue on the path of getting my shit together I could be a decent mother, but I’m still terrified of losing my mind and succumbing to psychotic delusions or suicidal ideations due to pregnancy hormones.

Fellow BPD havers: what are your thoughts on having kids? And if you do have kids, how is that going? Did you experience bad PPD/PPP? Any advice for people with BPD who may be considering kids in the future?

<3