Falling hard

So I just got out of therapy for suicidal thoughts and I am falling right back to where I started. My mother Just had a very painfull operation so I am taking care if her. My dad has a hernia so I am also taking care of him. I also have to deal with school. I really want to Just rest but I can't. And I can't go to therapy because I had my last session a week ago. And even if I could come back it would taken me a 1/3 of a year because of waiting lists. I feel like batman. In the daytime I am this "happy and energetic" kid and in the nighttime I want to die.