Update

Yes, my personal rants while I’m anonymous on the internet. Somebody called the cops on me a couple of hours before-hand. Taken to a ward for god knows how long and now have heavy medications I SHOULD be taking. I lied and said I’m feeling alright now. I feel like a shitty person for lying. My “friend” has come in a few times to check if I’m still breathing but that’s all it seems like he’s here for, considering all the sexual touching while I just want a hug. I’ve been trying to use alternative ways towards self destruction but it doesn’t help me feel any less shameful nor shitty. I just don’t know how to move forward. I’m so tired and I just wanna rest forever.