What the hell am i doing?!
I dont know if this is a good place for requesting dating advice. But im nearly 30 and ive come to the conclusion that i have no idea what im doing. I should explain, im a bi/gay male who has never had sex, and i think a lot of it is because my taste in people is so narrow. Im a thin guy, and in general i really only find thin, fair skinned people attractive. And i feel bad for being so shallow but too many times ill get all excited chatting with someone, well exchange pics and my heart (and libido) just sinks. I lose inyerest and i try not to be all "well i really liked you until i found out what you look like" but i know thats exactly whats happened and i think they do too and i feel terrible. Worse than that even if i see someone physically attractive, im such a fucking videogame/anime nerd that one or both of us arent interested in the other on a personal level. And while im in no way in favor of saving it till marriage or something. I just dont have it in me to go out and hoik up with someone i dont give a fuck about. So what do i do? At this point im just starting to get comfortable with the prospect of being truly forever alone
Posted Mar 18, 2013, 6:49 PM UTC
You could start meeting people, preferable gay ones, in real life and start from there instead of using the internet to get to know other gay guys. It might save a lot of time because then you can choose to only make an investment in time in people you find attractive.
This is probably good advice, but where would i even go to meet gay guys? I dont drink or smoke or anything so thats out. I dont see myself clubbing. I just feel lost offline :/
I don't smoke, drink or go clubbing either so that is not a must. :-)
What is really important is to what do you like? What are your passions what gets your hart beating and your blood pumping. I met my boyfriend on an Esperanto meeting for example, Esperanto was something I liked. Also I enjoy being part of a transition town group or a zeitgeist movement so I go to meetings and events of them and meet interesting people because they share my passions.
You probably have totally different interests then mine but try to find people meeting around things you really enjoy and go there. Be open about your sexuality and who knows you might just meet another nice gay guy with the same interests as you. :)
You also might to ask this in the r/askgaybros/ maybe there is more people there that can help you with their knowledge and ideas.