Why am I bleeding? Or, how simple statements can lead to assault charges

You may remember this tale that I told a few days ago from my days working at a busy gas station. Here is another one, thankfully shorter.

'Twas a nice summer day, one of those rare days in Oregon when the temperature is just right, the humidity is just right, and the breeze is just right so that everyone is wearing t-shirts, shorts, and a big smile. I was having a good day at work that day, as I had been told to be outside pumping gas in the sun and the warm. Customers were being polite and friendly. The manager was in a good mood. Everything was going smoothly. I should have known.

In pulls a large van and trailer, with Ohio plates. We're busy but not hyper-busy at this point, but I was always on the lookout for out-of-state plates. For those of you who don't know, Oregon (along with New Jersey) does not allow self-service gas. Been that way since the '40s. But many, many people don't know this. So I finished up the customer I was with, and jogged over just in time to see the Ohio driver get out of his car and approach the pump to pump his own.

I approached him, a sheepish smile on my face, my hands spread in a sign of apology, and politely informed him that, as an out of state resident, he might be unfamiliar with Oregon laws regarding self service. I'm also wearing a bright blue/white uniform combo with the company logo and my name in bright red. It's pretty obvious that I'm a gas attendant employed there and I'm not about to be an ass to him. However, his reaction was nearly instant, and extremely out of proportion to what I had just said. He got a nearly-Exorcist-level snarl of rage on his face.

And then punched me. In the nose.

Now, I'm not sure if he was just a weak individual, or if he had held himself back, but the punch wasn't THAT hard. Enough to make me take a couple steps back and say "Owwwww!" but not enough to drop me or make it hard to see. I touched my nose. Blood. Wow. I hadn't been punched in the face since I was in junior high. And this individual (definitely not a man) had just suckered me for being polite and friendly.

Now, if you remember for my last story, I was in college majoring in criminal justice while I was working at that station. Majoring in criminal justice isn't just sitting in classes learning about laws and investigative techniques. Some of the more...visceral...aspects of law enforcement are taught. Like unarmed self defense. And when the guy wound up for a second punch, I reacted with the training I'd been taught. Left foot forward, right hand grabbing their right wrist, left hand placed below their elbow, pivot clockwise on left foot while lowering right hand and raising left, place assailant's right hand in crook of left arm, grab assailant's right upper arm arm with left hand, lift up left arm. Boom, standard law enforcement hammer lock.

But now what? I look over at the nearest employee, who just happens to catch my eye, and see the blood coming down my face and a guy who looked like a short, bespectacled version of Ned Beatty wrapped up like a Taco del Mar Supreme Burrito in front of me. I didn't even have to say anything, he whipped out his cell phone and called 911.

Two units arrive rather quickly, and take custody of the guy, who really isn't talking, just snarling at me. I make a statement to the officers, and they go inside to review the security camera footage. Local paramedics were called, since I was bleeding pretty good. I refused to be taken to the hospital, though, since I didn't have insurance and an ambulance ride + ER visit = $$$$. I went to the doctor the next day, who x-rayed my head and said I had several broken nasal bones. This info was copied and given to the DA.

So Ohio guy got arrested and charged with Assault II, a class B felony. My manager was nice enough to send me home (with pay) since I looked like, well, like someone had punched me in the face, and that wouldn't be good for business. Ohio guy WAS from Ohio, apparently doing a massive road trip across the US, and due to lack of sleep (or some other lame excuse) came unglued at me. He plead out to Assault IV (class A misdemeanor) and spent a week in jail. I got three days of medical leave.

TL;DR - THAT'S why the bridge of my nose looks funny!