How I Got Over a Painful Breakup, Even When It Felt Impossible

Some of a single person’s darkest days fall after a breakup.

You risked your heart. You shared your life. You bought the gifts, made the memories, and dreamed your dreams together and it fell apart. Now, you’re back at square one and it feels lonelier than square one.

No one begins dating someone hoping to break it off someday. I always asked myself,

Why the breakup is so painful?

After a lot of pain, confrontation and introspection, I got a few answers:

1. They change the way we see ourselves
2. They alter our biological rhythms
3. Breakups are even harder when the relationship is highly committed

How I Got Over a Painful, Regretful, Heart-crunching Breakup?

1. It’s okay to cry — and you probably should.
2. Reconnect with things that make you happy.
3. Openly Discuss Your Feelings.
4. Write Out Your Thoughts and Feelings.
5. Understand That Break-ups Are Often An Inevitable Part Of Dating.
6. Don’t Personalize The Loss
7. Prioritize Self-Care
8. Try to Get Back Into A Routine, Hobby, Professional Work, Exercise etc
9. Give Yourself Some Slack
10. Don’t Lose Faith In People Or Relationships
11. Let Go Of The Hope You Will Get Back Together
12. Never Rely On Your Ex For Support
13. Never Try To Maintain A Friendship With Your Ex
14. Avoid Unhealthy Coping Strategies (Drugs, Overeating, Drinking Excessively, Self-Harm etc)
15. Make A List Of Your Ex’s Annoying Qualities & Negative Attributes.
16. Avoid The Temptation To Take Revenge
17. Examine And List Out What You Can Learn From The Relationship
18. Make A List Of All The Benefits Of Being Single (For Time Being)
19. Indulge in the Process of Letting Go.
20. Remove Or Burn All of the Photos of Your Ex, or burn some reminders of your ex
    in a ceremonial fashion.
21. Delete All Social Media Trails (Followers, Mutuals of Ex)
22. Remember That You Can Survive On Your Own
23. Don’t Pressure Yourself To Date Again If You’re Not Ready (Keep It Casual For The First Time)
24. Start a New, Different Type Of Relationship-- Pet, Books, Painting, Gardening, Planting, Social Work etc
25. Use Your New Free Time To Build New Skills or Habits
26. Consider Talking to a Therapist
27. Finally, Try to be Patient And Trust The Process.
28. Remember, The World Won't Care Now, But They Will Soon, So Be Prepared.

Hopefully, in the next post, I'll include a Few Tricks, Simple Exercises and Hacks which helped me to get over the Bad and painful Breakup, Till Then Be Strong!