FFS I fapped again, addiction + hidden sign

Failed, again! I'm down to like 1 fap a week, its normally a drunken fap, although I wouldn't be using alcohol as an excuse now, my country was built on alcohol :)

To cut a long story short, sex life is at a minimal due to young family/work etc etc.

So I've had a couple of drinks, everyone in bed (Accept for the dog) helmet busting, can hang a wet duffle coat on knob (Are duffle coats Irish)? A duffle coat was a really heavy coat your mum used to make you wear when you were a kid in Ireland, when it rained it was really heavy. In fact the Irish rugby team probably all wore wet duffle coats when they were kids. So what the fuck can I do with this extreme hard on????? Had to porn it. Starts of normal porn then progresses to nasty, ohhhh bit of nasty. Afterwards feel like a bag of shit, perversional (Is it a word) and bordering on depressional (Is that a word) ? I don't even know words.

Mark my words though (See what I done), in fact book mark them, I promise to my God that I will not fap for at-least 2 weeks from today. Although bizarre thing to promise, it works as I've never broken a promise to my God, even though i'm not sure which God he is. He will understand my pain I'm sure.

And the hidden sign or message to tie this whole thing together, a pop-up for online gambling from the porn site, so if ever cookies were doing their job this was it, trying to exploit someone with an addiction, and then of course came the realization that I do indeed have an addiction.

See you in 2 weeks