How can I help my husband be alright with me donating a kidney to a stranger? Am I being unfair? (Xpost from AskMen)

Thank you in advance if you wade through this. Background; I work in a hospital and see daily the pain and struggles renal patients go through with dialysis and the bravery, awesomeness and humour most of them use to get through it.

Dont get me wrong, I meet awful people too, but I am amazed at how strong and inspiring most these people are.

This is something I've been wanting to do for years...the math just makes sense to me. I have two and need one and there are twenty year studies that show donors have the same level of health or even better than the general population. Course there is selection bias as donors already must be healthy physically and mentally.

I donate plasma twice a month and am on the bone marrow donor list. I would donate in a heartbeat to my friends and family so why not someone else? Also now days altruistic donors have the potential to start donor chains and help more than one person. http://m.usatoday.com/article/news/1566328

My wonderful husband works in a job where he sees people doing terrible things to each other daily and has become a bit cynical, plus he adores me and is very protective. He also lost his mum, who raised him on her own, to cancer a few years ago and is scared he will lose me too.

So here's the main points;

1. I think the risks are minimal, and I have total faith that if in thirty years things go pear shaped science will be there.

2. We've finished having kids and if anything happened to them and they needed a transplant then my family or he would would step up.

3)We have kick ass health insurance and live in a country where health care is paid from our taxes.

4)I will resent him if he stops me doing this, which I know is awful and sounds so childish. Also the transplant team won't do it if he is not on board.

5. I feel really hurt as if he has or will ever come to me wanting to do something I have always been on board and would go out of my way to support and help.

6. I don't want to volunteer or fund raise instead, this will be the best use of my resources.

7. I don't want to donate any body parts until my death after this except continue with plasma donation.

8. The kids are teenagers and fine with it.

9. I raised this before we got together but the issue got dropped pretty quickly as life got busy and I think he hoped i would just forget about it.

10. Financially and work wise it's no worry

Am I being unfair? How can we sort this? I love him and don't want him to be scared but I want and need his help and support. We've seen the renal specialist and they are happy to begin the testing, but everything hinges on my beloved.

Here's a link to an AMA done recently by a physician/ anonymous kidney donor who puts things more eloquently than I. http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/11hrqp/iama_physician_and_kidney_donor_

TL;DR; I want to donate a kidney to a stranger, loving worried husband wants me intact. Edited; paragraphs