Solve this debate between my hubby and I, please, fellow redditors...

I'm not just a book lover but I also dabble in writing. My hubby is a fan of books too but generally very different genres than my favorites. I've tried several times to get him to read some of what he calls my "bodice ripper" romance novel series that are of a supernatural genre that I really think he might enjoy despite the romance mainstays. He refuses and more than once this has led to arguments that end with me growling about not understanding what's so different between my beloved bodice rippers and erotica (which we both will read eagerly but him more so than I honestly) and throwing my hands up in frustration. Help us out here... Is there really that big a difference in what is marketed to women as romance and men as erotica? Can someone please explain this?

Tldr: hubby and I keep butting heads over erotica vs romance novels. I say there's no big difference and he's missing awesome sexy scenes tucked in the plot. Someone help settle this for us!