It is not helpful to tell others that their bedroom isn't dead enough.

When someone has the courage to come and tell us about the circumstances of their dead bedroom, sometimes they get replies that say things like this:

You are lucky you get it twice a month.. I'm lucky if it's half that..

You get it once or twice a week, and you're COMPLAINING?!

Sex 30 times a year is more than I get

To be sure, there's a fine line between commiserating and invalidating. But keep in mind that these responses can affect the OP, and others who are reading that may be in a similar situation, but have not yet found the strength to post about it:

• Sending the message that they should be satisfied (and something is wrong with them if they aren't)
• Telling them sex isn't important enough to have that much, only as much as you think you need it
• Invaliding their pain and/or the circumstances of their situation
• Making them hesitate to share their situation with others and ask for help in the future

These are the same kind of responses that those with low libido sometimes give to their high libido partners when they want to blame and shame them for their sexual needs instead of exploring the issue together. And just like those responses, it is not helpful.