accountability: starting keto again, 100% this time

I am stuck in a really destructive pattern with trying to get started on keto. I’ve been lurking the subreddits for 9 months(!), but I haven’t been able to make a commitment to the lifestyle or lose any weight.

Here’s what keeps happening: I’ll decide I’m going to start keto. I’ll do well for a day or two, enter ketosis, feel good about myself. And then I cheat. I think my problem with this diet is the cheating—or at least, my mindset about cheating. Because as soon as I cheat on keto and I’m out of ketosis, I think, “Wow, well, the next 24 hours are shot anyway. I might as well enjoy a few things before I start back up again.” And I pig out on carbs. And if I’m being honest and accountable here, when I pig out I tend to buy things (like a 6 pack of beer, chips, etc) and if I don’t finish them in one day and they’re still in my apartment, I’ll put off re-starting keto for 2 days. 2 days of that "one last hurrah" mindset where I eat total crap because I want to enjoy it one last time before I give it up again.

With other diets I’ve tried (Weight Watchers, the 4 hour body), I did better about sticking to the diet, even though weight loss wasn’t very successful, because I would cheat and then immediately stop cheating. On other diets, my thought process was always something like, “Well, I screwed up a little. But I can still save the day/week if I just get right back on the wagon.”

I’m starting to wonder if keto just isn’t right for me, because it seems less forgiving of cheating because you get kicked out of ketosis. Maybe I just need a diet where a little bit of cheating doesn’t screw you up too badly. Because I can't seem to stop cheating.

I’ve spent months trapped in this cycle: - enter ketosis w/in about 18 hours or so of starting - 3-4 days of being “good” and sticking to it - cheat - figure what the hell and binge for 1 day (2 if it happens to be the weekend) - start over

As you can imagine, my weight is fluctuating within the same 7 or so pounds, over and over. I’m making NO progress.

Now I KNOW that the problem is me. It’s not a diet problem, it’s a willpower problem. I’m not complaining about keto at all, just trying to be honest with myself about what’s happening before I try something radical. Because here’s what I’m going to do: I’m stating here, publically, that I will commit to full keto, NO CHEATING, for 2 weeks (I know, that’s not that long, but anything longer seems unrealistic, and I’ve never made it more than 5 days). No excuses. I will give keto my all for 14 days. And then, if I’m still not satisfied or happy, I will move on to try something else (maybe paleo?). As much as I want to lose the weight, being stuck in this cycle of trying and failing over and over for months isn’t healthy, physically or psychologically. It's time to shit or get off the pot! Keto has so much potential, but even slower losses on a different diet would be better than the cycle I'm stuck in with keto. If any of you lovely ladies read this all, I appreciate it! I guess I'm just looking for encouragement, and telling someone about my resolution to commit to keto for 2 weeks seemed like it might help me stick with it!