First Father's Day Sober

I have 3 kids 17, 13 and 9. Im 8 months sober and as proud as I am of myself for that, I also feel the daily regret of wasting so many of the years drunk. There's countless holidays and birthdays I just really don't remember at all other than the pictures we took. I know I can't turn the clock back and I do put my best effort into living in the moment and savoring now rather than regretting the past, but it's still really hard. I'll never get those years back where I could've been a better father. As much as it hurts, I know my kids love me and I'm grateful that I am sober today. I hope all the father's out there have a great Father's Day weekend coming up God willing and if you are struggling just know that it does get better. I can't get that time back but I sure will do my best to not lose any more of it.