She (26F) broke up with me (30M) two months ago after 5 years. I did some no contact, which helped me, but we started talking again because of shared material things. Now, I have no clue what I'm supposed to do. Should I try to be a friend? Or just get my stuff and go back to no contact?

She fell out of love and didn’t want to work on improving our relationship. She's also going through a sort of mid-20s crisis and isn't sure what she wants in life. I accepted that, we were no longer emotionally compatible. Although I was ready to work on myself and on our relationship, she wasn’t, and that's okay. I think I’m over the breakup itself.

At some point, we’ll need to talk about everything that happened because, during our last conversation, I was too overwhelmed to think clearly. Now, I see things more clearly and have many questions about what happened, things I still don't understand of her behavior.

Here’s our current situation: I moved into a temporary flat, but most of my things are still at her place, and I do laundry there when she's not home. I've found a long-term flat and will be moving in a few weeks. Most of the furniture at her place was bought together, so we’re figuring out what she keeps and what I take. However, our texts and conversations often diverge into small talk, and we end up chatting about other things, like we are friends, like there could still be more, despite everything.

I’m unsure if I should have an honest conversation with her, sharing my feelings, realizations, and asking her how she’s doing, and if she still thinks the same things. When she broke up with me, she said she didn’t want me out of her life because it was impossible after sharing so much together. During the no contact period, I realized I feel the same way. I miss her, but not romantically.

However, the thought of her being with someone else, even casually, freaks me out. The thought of being replaced. That someone else might have a special spot in her heart like I had. This fear is keeping me distant because I don’t want to get hurt that way.

Maybe if I talk to her once and for all, I can free myself from this agony and finally move on, with her as friend or without. Or maybe is still too early and I am not emotionally ready for this yet. I just want peace.