I feel so childish.

I have terrible health anxiety and recently it’s been convincing me that there’s something wrong with my brain. I’ve been having frequent migraines, head and neck muscle twitches/spasms, felt like I’ve had goosebumps inside of my head, and other things that freak me out. So now I constantly think I’m gonna die but I already went to the hospital last month over something to do with my heart that ended up being nothing and I don’t wanna do that again, feels bad to waste a doctor’s time that could be used on something way more important than my delusional mind.

I’m home alone right now and just can’t shake the feeling of impending doom that anxiety gives you. Trying to stop myself from having a panic attack over literally nothing because I keep convincing myself I’m gonna die. Can’t even sleep because my brain won’t allow me to. I hate being alone at night because it’s just me and my thoughts, everything gets so much worse. I’m 17 and all of this anxiety makes me feel so childish because it just seems so irrational, but I can’t help it.