[867] Birthright to Bloodlust

Would love feedback on story title, it's a working title and I fear it is becoming increasingly outdated as the story changes.

Not sure what genre my story is. I've been calling it an "erotic psychological horror" which sounds like a shitpost tbh. It's about a serial killer blackmailing a succubus into being a murder accomplice, and then upon discovering said succubus is functionally immortal- a frequent-flyer murder victim. That last bit is more consentual than it sounds (long story haha) but every bit as horrifying. Things get nasty, they fall in love, and they go a little crazy trying not to get caught by their respective governments.

It deals a lot with themes of taboo desires, the lasting effects of childhood traumas, sex as therapy and self-harm, and clinging to destructive habits and addictions. They're characters that, when faced with the chance to change for the better, find comfort in wallowing in the dark. It also has very earnest attempts on my part at depicting and discussing BDSM, queer identities, and severe/demonized mental illnesses.

This is writing developing very early (pre-plot) characterization of the main character, Vex. It was originally intended as a possible story opening but I think I could do better? If it helps, this story is also intended to be conveyed in a mostly visual medium as I am a visual artist, but critiques about the quality of my writing and how to improve are greatly appreciated.

Content warning if you're sensitive to body horror, I would consider it mild though.

Read only: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1I1205xmzf7H8v_tIMYGVrY9tlHzhNTvigFxXwplWfQ4/edit?usp=drivesdk

Comments enabled: https://docs.google.com/document/d/12H9-Xe21AFFQyRYugKBXrGZQyozfpESuzd1821Q1q-g/edit?usp=drivesdk

My critique:

https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/s/tLRHlSrodl