looming dread of college coming up

i keep seeing these posts on instagram for upcoming school social events. as more school things are starting to come in, and it just makes me so scared and dreadful about what’s about to come.

last year sucked. it was my freshman year. although i tried to make friends (i really did— asking people to hang out, initiating plans, being friendly) all i really achieved was loneliness&depression. constantly initiating plans and making that effort got so exhausting when i didn’t receive that same energy back. i don’t know why but it seems like no one my age wants to be friends anymore.

just really want to find some like-minded friends this year 😭