Cocaine does something special to me.

I went through the whole roller coaster of addiction. I’ve got a really intense mental health history, and I feel like cocaine turned my life around, in a sense. I haven’t been doing it very often for quite a while and I’m at a point where I’ve been thinking I’ll just treat like a special occasion thing, but it’s not even necessarily “fun” enough for that now. I love the way it makes me feel, in a way, but not totally. I think I’m tired of the intensity or something. What I’m getting at, is that I feel like there could be prescription medications I could look into. I’m not trying to get high. I just like how it kills my social anxiety. I like how I feel like I can think straight, but I’m seeing now that I’m not totally thinking “straight” on cocaine. I’m thinking deep, but I trail off in a lot of directions. Am I needing anxiety medication along with something for ADHD?