Why wouldn't you just talk to me Liz

I need someone to tell me why I lost my family. I need you to give me some closure Liz. The restraining order from Court and the kids came after I quit meth. Courtney said she'd have the kids call me the night before. The affidavit is just some non-threatening emails. How does that justify 4yrs restraint? Courtney wouldn't let me have them the month leading up to being served. She never lies and that month was full of fake reasons they weren't available. The last time we ever talked you said you loved me Liz. I was sober over a year and no one cared. I have no issue working....my issue is I lost my family YEARS ago and I don't know why. My nerves are shot and I just need one person to love me enough to talk to me....why couldn't it be you? Why did you all leave me in the dark to die alone? Why? WHY