i dont actually wanna stop being depressed, i just feel embarrassed about depending on my family so much

im 22 years old and about to finish college (which took me longer that it shouldve bc by the end of it i started failing classes), i cant find an internship in my area (which also has to do with my empty curriculum since i barely did anything during college) and im entirely sustained by my parents. it embarrasses me so much but its been feeling like im gonna be stuck like this until im such a burden to them that i have to kill myself.

ive been depressed since i was a preteen but i only had the courage to talk about it with them this year (and only bc i failed a class for the second time and i needed to explain why to them). ive been taking antidepressants for three months and going to therapy for one but i feel the exact same from before i started the treatment and i knew my expectations were too high (what i truly wanted was a magic pill that would resolve every single one of my problems w/o me having to do anything) but i feel like i should at least have gotten the drive to get a "normal" job (my parents would much prefer for me to take a job related to my diploma but the constant rejections im getting tell me im in no condition to get one) so i can least start paying my bills in the house.

i dont mind staying the whole day home moping until my dad asks me hows my treatment going or a friend talks to me about getting their mom a gift with money they got from their job. i feel like the idea of no longer being a burden to my parents is the closest thing to an ambition i have but its still not strong enough to get me to actually do what i need to be independent.

im very fortunate to have come from a privileged and loving family but its not like they are straight up rich to keep supporting me financially through life and they couldnt find me any jobs through people they know either. idk what to do anymore