Struggling with Self-Respect and Dealing with People Who Talk Behind My Back

I’m dealing with this frustrating situation where I know people talk badly about me, but despite that, I still treat them kindly. I laugh at their jokes, I talk to them like everything’s normal, and I don’t see them any differently. But inside, it feels like I have so little respect for myself because I’m not supporting myself in this situation. I just pretend I don’t know what they’re really thinking about me.

I can’t seem to hate them, though. I always convince myself that maybe that’s not what they really think, and that they’re actually good people. I end up blaming myself, thinking that I’m annoying or something, and that’s why they talk about me. I feel stuck in this loop of not standing up for myself, but also not being able to distance myself from them.

How do you deal with situations like this without compromising your self-respect? HOW TO HAVE SELF RESPECT?