Seeking Guidance for Mod Dev

Long story short, I want to create mods and just can't wrap my head around it.

Long story long: I'm 24 years old, back in the days of middle school I stumbled across this video of Notch programming Minecraft on the fly in Debug mode, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BES9EKK4Aw4 That video sparked my interest in programming and probably tech in general. I've always wanted to learn how to code, whether it be for web development, game dev, or Minecraft mods. I've tried many, many times over the years to learn, but I always get stumped and give up. Also, just the general lack of passion for the things I try to learn with contributes to me giving up. However, I've always had some sort of passion for minecraft. If you ask me, it is by far the best game ever created and will probably hold that title for a long time (Ive got somewhere over 30k hours into the game, across platforms, dating back to 2011)

I really want to make mods and I feel like if I got good at it I could make some really cool and unique stuff, but I need some guidance. Im desperately reaching out here, anyone who could help me, whether thats just pointing me in the right direction, or even going as far as to mentor me, that would be greatly appreciated. Anytime I try to follow a tutorial series, I get so lost and confused so quick, no matter who Ive tried learning from.