Is Anybody Here Truly Honest With Their Therapist/Psychiatrist?

Is anybody in here truly honest with their psychiatrist or therapist about how poorly their doing? I feel like the zeitgeist here is to keep it under wraps to avoid hospitalization, but tell me if I'm wrong.

I'm transitioning from Seroquel to Latuda, and right now I'm on what could be considered a therapeutic dose for both drugs. I've experienced some pretty severe anhedonia to the extent that the usual life pursuits marriage, career, fulfilling my dreams seem pointless. There are times where I've experienced akathisia which has at its worst led to me praying to God for a relief one way or the other.

What's worse is during those times I've experienced suicidality that scares me a little. I had to get rid of my old lithium and depakote because I realized I had enough to end my life.

The secret? I've almost always been passively suicidal because of an abusive home life and trauma, but it's something I rarely talk about with clinicians and when I do, they think it's something new rather than me just being honest. I'm not afraid of hospitalization because I've had so many harrowing experiences nothing could really surprise me in there.

I've been tolerating these symptoms because I don't want to prematurely end what could end up being a helpful treatment, especially once I'm off the other med. Thoughts?