[1648] From the Banescar to the Vael'ren. Chapter

This is the first written chapter of my attempt at novelizing the D&D campaign that I have been running for my friends for the past several months. As a result, the story begins in media res, beginning during the scene where the party meets instead of their "inciting incidents," which is buried in their backstories. I have a feeling that my attempts to avoid bogging down the pace with exposition have led to too little information for the reader, but I invite your opinion. I will probably need a prologue. I'm primarily seeking insight on my writing style, prose, grammar, and overall competency to ensure I'm not too far off base before I begin writing a first draft for the rest of the campaign.

Submission: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1lfG3BvBlno_f3hbbJ8GEEFCxilZ-wFWf0PAn-BAitwo/edit?usp=sharing

Critique: https://old.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1hydbej/2167_medieval_fantasy_but_in_southcentral_asia/m6jjgys/