I broke up with my boyfriend and I’m drowning

I 23F broke up with my boyfriend 22M three nights ago, after 8 months of dating. It was a culmination of things, but essentially I didn’t like the way he spoke to me when he was tired stressed or upset. He got snappy and mean, and even said some personal things when I had nothing to do with the reason why he was upset. I communicated that to him and for a time it got better until Friday when he yelled at me because I called a celebrity hot. Like full on yelling. To me hot is just an adjective, to him it meant more and that’s fine, but instead of communicating that with me he started yelling. I really struggled with this because I love him so much but I wasn’t ok being treated like that, and I had already communicated that to him and he just full on escalated it. So I broke up with him a few nights ago. It was awful. It took 3 hours and he was sobbing and begging me to stay and saying he’d go to therapy alone and we could go to therapy together. I cried so so much that night and the days since. I almost said yes. But I felt I had to stand up for myself and that I was done being treated that way. It shouldn’t take me leaving to make him realize that he needs to change his behaviors. It just feels like he can’t control his emotions and gets so lost in them he says and does things without realizing it.

90% of the time we were so happy but that other 10% was so intense. Now though I miss him so much, how silly we were together and how he smelled. I can’t tell if I regret it or if I’m just feeling lonely, I don’t know. But part of me wants him back. But I also think he needs to work on himself on his own, for himself instead of for me. I don’t know. I still love him so much. Even though I broke up with him I’m still hurting so much. I didn’t want to but I felt I had to. I don’t know. We’re going no contact till Sunday when he’s going to come by to get his stuff. I already want to see him, I miss him. But I still feel the way he spoke to me was unacceptable and disrespectful and he already knew that. I’m just lost. I feel so sad and lonely, and like I lost my person even though people keep telling me my person wouldn’t treat me like that. Anyone have insight or advice?