dont know if i should feel dissapointed, mad, or not care

i hate this school and these baking classes, 3 whole years of having them and ive been just staring at them, watching them not doing anything, everytime im given something half of the time the students

yesterday i stood for 3. whole. hours. standing up straight, my feet HURTING, just staring at the teacher making this cake, only 6 of us in this damn class, and to rub salt in the wound for me she says "yeah you didnt do anything, ill give you something next time" WOULDNT IT BE EASITER. TO LEND THE WORK. IF THERES MUCH LESS PEOPLE IN CLASS.??

i figured that baking sweets will be much easier, since there would be alot of work to distribute to people, and were not in a time crunch, and the first day i was complimented how much i was doing well

the teachers dont care, weve tried talking to them for a long time but nothing has changed, i cant be put in my own classes (makes sense) nor can i quit - thats the whole point, itd be stupid not to join in, it makes it worse for me because i keep wondering if everyone will think im werid just for being here no matter what, standing or sitting

i cant snap back, im not that good in my native language so ill sound corny and no matter what i do ill never be taken seriously by my classmates, i cant show that im upset or else theyll make snarky comments, but i cant start an argument over someone who jst wants to sit down when theres 3 chairs in this classroom, and it will make everything anyway

im both "shes not doing anything in class, its unfair!" to "she cant do anything! let us take it instead of her", i cant fucking win, the teachers KNOW is what gets me, i try and stand right next to stuff like a hawk and they cant say "hold on, i think she wants to try" to anyone whos much quicker then me

i dont even like baking at all, fuck maybe IM overreacting and they are right and im not realising it because im whallowing in my own pitty, but atleast let me do SOMETHING since im here, high school is temporary but ive regretted my descision a long time ago