My brothers wife is really rude to me

Once, I went to visit my brother. His Chihuahua loves me and immediately jumped into my arms, getting my glasses all covered in saliva. I asked my brother’s wife where I could find some wet wipes to clean my glasses, and she pointed to a shelf.

When I took the wipes, she started speaking a rude way, that I had grabbed the wrong ones. I got angry and headed toward the exit. Right by the door, I tried to talk to her.

She said I irritated her because of the way I behaved in the past (she didn’t like that I was sloppy, though personally I think she was just picking on me).

I said that I had only taken the wrong wipes by accident, and whatever I did in the past didn’t give her the right to yell at me or be rude.

She said I annoyed her. I replied that the fact I annoyed her was no reason for me to accept her being rude to me.

She then said that in her own home, she would behave however she wanted and that I would just have to put up with it.

After that, I left my brother’s apartment without another word.

For a while, I didn’t go to visit them, even though my whole family spent time there.

One day, my brother invited me over, and I did visit. Another time, he invited me to join a barbecue with a group of people.

Also, in her own family, my brother’s wife is often rude to her mother, her uncle, and so on. For example, she was shouting at her mom for accidentally breaking the coffee cup.

In my brother’s wife’s family, there’s a tradition of giving gifts to one another on various holidays.

On one of these holidays, my brother’s wife gave me a T-shirt. It was difficult for me to thank her in person because I still felt disrespected, so I asked my brother to pass on my thanks.

On another holiday, I bought gifts for my brother’s daughter and for my brother’s wife. I didn’t want to give his wife a gift, but I felt obligated since she had given me one.

Suddenly, I felt very angry and wrote to my brother that his wife shouldn’t give me any more gifts and that I wouldn’t give her gifts either, because I was still upset about that time she was rude to me and about her generally rude behavior toward me.
My brother didnt answer anything.

I’m not sure whether I should participate in this gift-giving tradition, and I don’t know how to deal with her rudeness.

I need advice on how to behave towards her in the future. Should I just accept her being rude to me or stop communicating with her at all.