Coming out for my hookup/bf

All characters are 18+

This is part 17 of the Collision series, where a blowjob led to a hookup, which led to much more. Last time, we sucked each other off in the car on a road trip.

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#Chapter 17: The Truth Comes Out

(Pierce’s POV)

I really, really wanted to have a good day with Calvin. Well, to be real, every day had been better since meeting him—or re-meeting him, rather. But a phone call from Joey definitely put a bit of a damper on things.

But Calvin deserves better, I thought as we approached Victorville. I knew that him showing me his parents’ house and the courthouse his sister apparently frequented would be either difficult or very cathartic. Knowing Calvin, it would probably be both. And I just wanted to be there for him.

All the way back when we had first hooked up on my lunch break, months before, I had seen something in him. Something that I wondered if he even saw in himself. I saw potential, like a geode waiting to be cracked open.

Little did I know how true that was. Calvin was a sparkling gemstone with the luster of a thousand suns. But his self-doubt was like a corrosive rash, spreading to all parts of him and eroding at his confidence.

All I wanted was for him to see his shine, too. Because his shine reflected on me, making me feel more seen than I ever had before.

And so, even if my brother was planning to ‘smear the queer,’ like we used to play, I wasn’t going to let that ruin my day with Calvin. He deserved better. I deserved better, too.

Even though I was too cowardly to live authentically.

But with Calvin, I felt brave. I felt strong. I felt like things were right.

“Alright, you sure?” He asked, confirming I was okay to continue our day. It wouldn’t be the first time I spent all day worrying about seeing Joey.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I said, and I decided to tell him the story. “One time, when I was young, and Joey was in high school, I had accidentally scratched his car with my bike. But he was big, and I was little, and so he drove us all to school without me saying a thing. He didn’t seem to notice that morning.”

“Did he find out?”

“That’s the thing. It didn’t matter if he did, because I spent the entire fucking day in a state of panic. Got so bad that my teacher sent me to the office because I started crying when it was time to go home.”

“Aw, babe,” Cal breathed.

“So, by the time I got home,” I continued, “I was a snotty, crying mess. And my dad still made me confess to Joey. Said something like, ‘tell the truth, even if you’re afraid, because it always comes out.’ Ironically, Joey wasn’t even that mad.”

Cal pointed to a street, so I turned down it.

“But he did warn me never to lie or hide things from him again. ‘Big brothers always know.’” I laughed and rolled my eyes. But inside, I was panicking just like that day at school.

“Right here,” said Cal, now pointing at a house. I pulled off to the side and parked.

“And what’s this?” I asked, rubbing the back of my head. “Sorry… Mind’s racing.”

“My parents’ house,” he answered. “Ready to go meet ‘em?”

I froze. “What?” Then I looked over at my man and saw he was hiding a smile.

“Kidding. I wouldn’t do that to you,” he laughed. “I’m sorry. I make jokes when things are tense.”

I laughed, too, feeling a wash of relief. “Oh, I needed a laugh,” I admitted.

“But yeah, this is their house. I don’t know if they’re home. Dad works security at an office, and my mom is a secretary in the same building.”

We drove away, next, to the courthouse. Calvin gasped and started laughing again.

“That’s my sister,” he said, pointing to a downtrodden looking girl sitting on the front steps. She sat with her head in her hands, her dark hair falling in front of her face like a veil. “I didn’t actually expect to see her here.”

“Wanna go say hi?” I offered. “Might as well have two uncomfortable sibling chats today.”

He just rolled his eyes. “If Sabrina is here, she’s probably drunk. Or she was drunk. And honestly, she’s probably waiting for my parents to pick her up.”

The way he talked about his family always seemed to come from a place of hurt. He clearly tried to sound dismissive and detached, but I knew there was more to it than that.

“Let’s get outta here,” I said. “We should grab lunch.”

Cal nodded, but he kept staring at his sister, who sat, unmoving on the steps. As I reversed out of the parking spot, she looked up, and Calvin gasped again.

“I think she saw me,” he muttered, covering his face with his hands until I pulled away. “Ironically, my parents would be mad at me if they knew I was in town and didn’t say hi.”

“I get it,” I sighed. “I hope you didn’t feel, like, pressured to come here today.”

“No, Pierce,” he said. “This was my idea, I think. And it’s fine. Worst case… My family is mad at me. Then they’ll just leave me alone even more. Win-win, really.”

“Okay. Let’s get lunch, yeah?”

Cal nodded, and so I found a chain restaurant for us. He seemed to come back to himself during the meal, which helped me do the same.

I need to focus, I thought. Can’t ruin the day for the guy.

“You probably want to get back, huh?” He said with a mouth full of food.

I shrugged. “Meh. I’m in no rush. I’d rather just enjoy today with you.”

And so that’s what we did.

When our server came back with fresh ice waters, I asked her, “Do you guys do anything for birthdays? Because it’s this guy’s birthday today!”

Cal’s eyes got wide, and he kicked me under the table as his face turned a shade of red.

Our server came back again with a slice of chocolate cake—and the rest of the restaurant staff to sing their version of a birthday song. Calvin sunk into his chair until they left, but he and I split the slice of cake and paid our bill.

“You’re an asshole for that,” he joked as we walked back to my car. But then he said, “Thank you, babe.”

“Gotta embarrass my man a little,” I teased. We got back into my car and started driving around some more.

We eventually drove out along old Route 66, which was rather barren apart from something called the Bottle Tree Ranch, which was quite literally a bunch of tall, thin structures that were decorated with glass bottles to look like trees. We then drove through Apple Valley and Hesperia, and we both realized that despite its size, in both mileage and population, there wasn’t a whole lot to do. Much like the rest of the desert.

“Next trip,” I chuckled as we started a slow drive back up I-15, “we’re definitely going down the hill. San Bernardino, alone, has more to do than all three cities here.”

“You’re so right,” said Calvin, leaning his head back against the headrest of his seat and reaching across to my knee. After a few minutes, he asked, “So what’s the plan for tonight? I don’t want you to have to be alone after talking to your brother.”

I tensed up as I remembered what the evening had in store.

“Oh, yeah,” I sighed. “Uhh… Maybe I can come over to your place and get high as fuck, and you can just hold me?” I didn’t want to sound desperate, but I had a feeling I’d need him.

“Of course, babe. That’s, honestly, what I hoped.”

“Okay,” I breathed.

The drive back to Metrena was pretty quiet, but Cal’s hand stayed on my knee the whole time. Like a safety harness, I felt good knowing he was there for me. I hoped he understood that I was there for him, too.

Back at my place, Calvin packed his bag and set it by the door.

“You got this, Pierce.” He put his hands on my arms as we stood face to face. “Tell him whatever you need to tell him, okay?”

The truth, I thought. Even if I’m afraid. It always comes out.

Calvin kissed me goodbye, offering to wait in the closet or the parking lot, but I assured him I could be brave, and that I’d come see him as soon as I could.

When he was gone, my heart started racing. But I pulled out my phone and texted Joey that I was home, praying he would come alone. I only had enough mental strength to handle one tough conversation.

And then, after what felt like an eternity, pacing back and forth, Joey buzzed, so I buzzed him up. Avoiding eye contact, I let him in, and he kicked off his shoes.

“Got any beer?” He asked, sounding gruff. He was still wearing his work clothes.

“Check the fridge; I can’t remember.” My voice came out shaky, thin.

He found some, bringing a bottle for me as we both sat on the edge of my bed. I’d made sure to put away the lube and any other traces of debauchery—Cal took his bowl—before Joey arrived.

So now, it was just my oldest brother and me. And I knew he was just waiting to ask me those questions I’d tried to dodge for years.

“Alright, man,” he finally sighed after downing half the bottle. “So, what do you have to say? What’s up with that weird dude?”

“He’s not weird,” I snapped. Then I realized I’d fallen into a trap.

“Huh…” Joey raised an eyebrow. “Then you definitely know him. And he was definitely wearing your shirt, yeah?”

I took a deep breath in through my nose, and I started to nod, knowing honestly was the only path to take. “Yeah.”

“Alright, so then what’s the deal? And don’t make me ask.”

I knew I’d have to tell the truth. I’d promised him, and I knew the truth would eventually come out. And so I had to.

“Fine,” I sputtered. “I’m gay, and that’s my fucking boyfriend. Are you happy?”

I was shaking, gripping the brown bottle with both hands and still avoiding eye contact. The silence in the room was so much that I could only hear my heartbeat pounding in my ear.

I had to say something.

“So, what? Do you hate me now? I’m the faggot of the family, right?” In truth, I didn’t really know.

“Pierce, what?” I leaned his elbow down on one knee with his legs spread on the corner of the bed. “I know I’m an asshole; it’s kinda my thing. But, for god’s sakes, when have I ever been a homophobe?”

I was caught off-guard.

“What?”

“Dude, you think none of us have ever wondered? You haven’t had a girlfriend, like, ever. And that’s not like a Henderson. Me and Ryker were swimming in bitches.”

“Ew, Joey,” I grimaced. “But yeah, I guess, I thought you guys might figure it out on your own. And it’s not like I haven’t been getting laid.”

“Ew, Pierce,” he said with a wink. But then his face got stern. “But I have to be real with you. It kinda fuckin’ sucked to find out this way. At Mama’s, of all places.”

“Yeah, I didn’t even think about that. We were stoned, and—”

“Stoned?!” Joey sounded shocked. “Now, you’re doing drugs?”

“Chill out, dude.” I rolled my eyes. “I just came out to you, and you’re worried about me smoking weed?”

“Well, do I even know my brother?” In a way, Joey sounded hurt. “Like… I see you every week, and I’m only now learning things about you. What the fuck?”

“Whatever, Joey. I’m telling you now, aren’t I? And weed is legal, anyway.” I genuinely couldn’t get over the fact that his biggest hang up seemed to be my smoking, and not my homosexuality.

“Pierce, listen… Why lie? Why hide who you are? That’s some pussy shit. A Henderson owns who he is.”

“I didn’t lie,” I muttered. Except by omission…

“Well you certainly didn’t tell the truth. And I know you didn’t just turn gay recently.” He swigged some more beer and asked again, “So, why lie?”

“Because I was scared, Joe! Duh!” I had to take a drink of beer, too, to get my mouth wet again. “And then, suddenly, I’m 27 and in the closet.”

“Well, dude, I don’t know much about all that. But I know that you need to grow some fuckin’ balls, alright? I respect everyone—everyone except a coward. And I know you’re not a coward.” I looked over at him, and he was staring at me.

And suddenly came a lump in my throat.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, turning away to fight tears. “I don’t want to embarrass you.”

I felt a stinging sensation on the back of my head. Joey had slapped me, and I felt a mix of shock and fear until he spoke again.

“Quit that shit. What did I say? Own who you are!” Then his hand was on my back, softer this time. “You’re my brother. I’m always gonna be embarrassed of you… But not because you like dudes.”

Tough love, I realized.

And then the tears came. I buried my head in my hands as the lifelong tension melted away in a flash. And again, I was embarrassed to be crying in front of my brother. But I couldn’t stop it.

And to my surprise, he rubbed my back, which is what he used to do when I was really little. Back before I realized how complicated the world could be, and Joey was just Joey. But I realized in this moment that he still was Joey. Despite the years, we were still the same little boys.

“All I’m gonna say—and it’s the last thing I’ll say—is that you need to tell Mom and Dad.” He took his hand off my back. “I can tell Ry, if you want. He probably won’t give a fuck.”

It was like he knew exactly what I was worried about. I understood, then, that the close-knit family we had been never really went away, no matter how much of myself I had hidden.

“Yeah,” I sniffled. “You can tell Ryker. I’ll tell Mom and Dad at dinner this week.”

“That’s right,” said Joey, stepping back into his more hardened persona.

So I dried my eyes, and we each drank another beer. It wasn’t too late yet, but it was nearing sunset, which happened earlier each night.

“Alright, I’m gonna hit the road,” Joey grumbled as he put his shoes back on. “Last time I say this: I love you, man. And I love you a whole lot more now that I feel like I really know you.”

And with that, he was out the door. I knew I wanted to go see Cal, but I also wanted to bask in how I was feeling in the moment. So I flopped down onto my bed, staring at the ceiling. Immense relief mixed with pride and happiness, and I almost felt like something inside me was different. Like I was starting to step into the life I was supposed to live.

Suddenly came a buzz from the panel by my door. I jumped to my feet.

Did Joey forget something? I wondered, scanning my apartment.

So I hit the call button and asked, “Joe?”

But the reply wasn’t Joey.

“It’s me, babe.”

“Calvin?”

“Yeah, I didn’t feel right leaving you alone,” he answered. So I buzzed him up, and he must have run, because he was at my door in just a few seconds.

I opened the door, and his comforting arms were around me.

“You okay?” He asked. “How did it go? I know you’re coming over, but I… I got home and showered, but I felt like I needed to come back, so I just waited for your brother to leave.”

He pulled away from the embrace, studying my face.

“It actually went well,” I said, smiling softly.

Cal gasped, and he grabbed my face and kissed me.

“I’m so fucking proud of you. I was shitting bricks all day. You’re really brave; you know that?” He kissed me again.

Maybe I am brave… I pondered.

So I explained what went down as I packed some things to stay at Calvin’s. And then I followed him home in my car. Once inside his place, he grabbed me by the hips and pushed me against his door, staring at my lips.

“Wanna smoke?” He asked, sliding a hand down to my crotch. At his touch, it was like my body remembered sex, and I got hard.

“Either way,” I grinned, reaching for his bulge—hard, too, “let’s go up to your room and take off our clothes. I was kinda hoping you might suck my cock on the drive, but it wasn’t a very long one, was it?”

Hand in hand, he led me up the stairs, saying, “And way too much traffic. But now we’re alone.”

Inside his room, I started to strip, and Calvin’s hands were quickly on my body, as if magnetically attracted to my bare skin. I helped him take his shirt off, and we rubbed our clothed, throbbing bulges against each other as we started making out.

I need this release, I realized. It had been a long, tense day, and now it was time to let it all go.