[QCrit] Seeking Query feedback: upmarket adult Awaiting Takeoff (52300/ 1stdraft)

I've joined this group less than 2 hours ago and realized I've been querying all wrong. I did an overhaul of my query letter and would love feedback. please let me know what works and needs improvement. keep in mind I'm an artist & I'm sensitive about my ishh. ;)

Dear [Agent],

Naomi Ramirez is a terrible liar. But that doesn’t stop her from trying. A flight attendant perpetually on the move, she’s mastered the art of avoidance: her love life, her overdue bills, and her long-neglected dream of becoming a writer. But this year will be different. It has to be.

She’s moving to a new city, making new friends, and—most importantly—ignoring calls from DO NOT ANSWER**.** She even manifested it during her morning meditation, so it has to be true.

But as she settles in, determined to finally get her life on track, she finds herself caught between two men—one who has never taken her seriously and one who just might. Tensions rise, old habits flare, and before she knows it, Naomi is doing what she does best: packing her bags and running.

But when she finally runs out of places to escape to, she’s forced to ask herself the one question she’s spent her life avoiding—who is she when there’s nowhere left to go?

Awaiting Takeoff is a 52,000-word upmarket novel that blends humor, heartbreak, and self-discovery. With the sharp wit and emotional depth of Seven Days in June by Tia Williams and the self-sabotaging charm of Luster by Raven Leilani, my novel explores the illusions we cling to in the pursuit of love—and the turbulence that follows when we finally face the truth.

Be Well,

Deremi B